


everything i try (just takes you further from me)

by catgenderclover, WinterWandering



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Co-Written, Dave | Technoblade and Wilbur Soot and TommyInnit are Siblings, Dave | Technoblade's Chat, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Parent Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Post-Manberg-Pogtopia War on Dream Team SMP (Video Blogging RPF), Sad Dave | Technoblade, Sad TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Tubbo is mentioned, sbi, sleepy bois inc - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-14
Updated: 2020-12-14
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:28:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28076238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/catgenderclover/pseuds/catgenderclover, https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinterWandering/pseuds/WinterWandering
Summary: caught between space and timethis isn't what we had in mindbut maybe some dayor, the aftermath of the festival, featuring a broken family.
Relationships: Dave | Technoblade & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Dave | Technoblade & TommyInnit, Dave | Technoblade & Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit & Phil Watson, TommyInnit & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), theyre a family ur honnor
Comments: 3
Kudos: 116





	everything i try (just takes you further from me)

“Why did you do that?” Tommy’s voice trembles as he stares at his father, tears in his eyes. “Why would you-” 

His father-  _ Phil _ -stares at him, masked pity in his eyes. 

  
Philza looks somewhat disconcerted, like he isn’t even all there, blood stains still fresh on his hands, as he looks towards his youngest. “He…” He thickly swallows. “He asked me to. I--he begged me to. He...He was suffering, Toms.” He says, quietly, almost a whisper as he tries in an useless effort to take the blood off of his hands.

Tommy takes a step back, something like fear and confusion in his eyes. “You could have- dad- you didn’t need to kill him! You- we could have left! We could have gone back  _ home _ !” The blond scrubs his tears away as his father stares at him. “I just want to go home…” Dropping his arm, Tommy sighs, half turning away from the winged man. “Please…” 

“Toms…” A soft whisper escapes Philza’s throat. 

“You said you’d always be there for me! For me and Techno and Wilbur! I  _ miss _ you!”    
  
In that moment, Philza is sure he can hear his heart break. Tommy wraps his arms around Phil, who hugs him back, his wings shielding the boy. As if he could shield the boy from all the hate and bloodshed of the world. “I know. I know…” Tommy wishes he wasn’t so ruled by emotions, he wishes he could be cold and emotionless, (but was Techno even emotionless?) like Techno. He thinks everything would be much better if the feelings would just...go away. However, that’s not how it works, and Philza holds his son close to him. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” He says, his voice breaking. “I’m sorry.”

Tommy shakes and sobs in his father’s hold as tears fall down his face. “Dad, I want to go  _ home _ !” Phil combs a hand through his youngest’s hair, dusty and bloodstained as he was, and murmurs soft words of comfort to him. “I wanna be a family again, dad!” 

“I know honey, I know. I shouldn't have let Wilbur take you with him, I’m so  _ sorry _ , and I cannot make up for what happened.”    
  
Phil nods, the tears making a wet spot in his shirt, but he doesn’t really mind. In this moment, he wants to hold his sons, and make everything okay again. “I know. Wilbur was…” His voice has a slight tremor as he tries to find the right word. “He wasn’t...himself, Toms. I knew that the minute I saw him. He was hurt. He...That wasn’t the Wilbur we knew, and I wish I saw it earlier. I just…” He sighs, and keeps his son close to his chest, however allowing room if he wishes to pull away.

Tommy doesn’t. 

There’s the soft crunching of gravel, and his oldest son stops, letting out a sharp gasp at the sight of his father. “Dad….?” 

“Techno…” Something in Phil...breaks as he sees the anarchist looking scared at the sight of him. “What happened?” Tommy moves away from his hug then, at the sound of his brother- and let out a feral scream, throwing himself at the fuschia haired male. Quickly, the winged male grabs the blond around his waist. 

“Tommy, what’s going on? You two are so  _ close _ !” 

“You killed Tubbo! You killed him!” 

  
Philza can’t help but jump inwardly at the scream, but still grabs Tommy, as gentle as a father can, while still restraining the boy. “Tommy, calm down!” He tries to console the boy, who, currently, is kicking and screaming Phil, trying to get at Techno. Phil has his long sleeved robe on, so his arms are fine, but _ damn  _ does the kid kick hard. Despite all this, he keeps a steady grip on the child.

Technoblade, however, looks the opposite of Tommy. While Tommy is kicking and screaming, downright clawing at Philza’s arms to get at the boy, Technoblade is standing still, completely frozen. As if this was a scene, stuck in a snow globe. He does try to speak, but his mouth comes up dry.

“I- dad, I’m-” 

“Tommy, what are you talking about?” Phil is...worried, definitely, but there’s concern in his voice as he speaks. “Techno, what is he  _ talking _ about?” His voice was steely, and there is no room for ignoring his question. 

The shapeshifter bites his lip, not wanting to speak. But he does anyway, wanting to explain himself. “Dad, I had to do it- the voices- it was too much pressure!” 

Tommy growls, throwing himself forwards again, trying in vain to get out of Phil’s hold. “I hate you! I hate you, Techno! I wish we were never brothers!” 

“You don’t mean that Toms…” Techno whispers softly, pain in his voice and his every movement. 

“I do! I hate you! I hate you with every bone in my body!” 

“Tommy, honey, calm down.” 

“He killed Tubbo, dad! He killed my best friend!” A little voice in Tommy’s head murmurs that they weren’t best friends. They were something like...platonic soulmates. And Techno had killed his other half! 

How could Tommy trust him…?   
  
Philza knew about the ‘chat’, as Techno called him. The voices. And while, he felt for his son-- He had no idea what it would be like to constantly have voices, screaming at you to hurt others-- He knew how close Tommy and Tubbo were. The two of them were inseparable, and while he didn’t know what exactly had happened, he understood why Tommy was so upset. Tommy, still screaming and kicking, tries to push away the red hot anger that forms at his core, but it only bubbles over more. That was his other half. His best friend in the entire world. Best friends as soulmates, if you will.

Techno, stood still, staring at the screaming boy. And even with this, the voices still tell Techno to yell at Tommy, walk off without another word, have the last say. But he doesn’t. He just stands still, and puts his shaking hands in his pockets. “I…” He doesn’t think the words could come out, even if they wanted to. “They wanted me to, Tommy. I had too.”

“ _ Who _ ?!  _ Who _ Techno?!” There’s a fresh round of tears in Tommy's eyes as he speaks, and bits of confusion color his tone. “What the fuck do you  _ mean _ , the voices?” 

“Tommy, you didn’t...”

“You did this! Techno, it wasn’t peer pressure!” The blond’s voice trembles, and anger and sadness and  _ betrayal _ , well up in Tommy’s chest. “You’re a bastard, Techno, and I wish you had never- never become this...” At a loss for words, the blond gestures at the bloodstained and dirt covered man. “I just… _ why _ ?”    
  
Tommy wants to punch the ground-- or, better yet, punch Techno-- curse this world, put all his anger into his fists or his swords, but he knows it's no use. He’s so damn  _ tired _ of this. Techno, however, is slowly starting to look worse for wear, a bit more panicked. “They told me to! I had to, Tommy! They get so loud...You don’t understand. No one does. It’s so  _ loud _ .” He murmurs, knowing logically placing his hands over his ears wouldn’t do much, but he does it anyway. 

“Who, Techno?! Who in fuck’s name are you even talking about?” That seems to make Techno snap.

“The voices! The ones in my head, and they don’t ever stop unless I do what they want. Blood for the blood god, after all.” He snarks, a bit more dryly and sad then he’d like. Tommy looks at a loss for words, flailing his arms around. 

“ _ What??? _ ”

“What the hell do you  _ mean _ , ‘what?’ Tommy, I’ve told you about this!” Techno frowns slightly, regret at the harsh words he spat appearing almost instantly.  _ Did he? Or did he just think he did? _

“No, you haven’t!” Tommy cries out, and Techno freezes at that, a hint of worry passing over his face. “Techno, I don’t know what you’re talking about!” 

“Oh Toms…” Phil’s oldest murmurs, reaching a hand out to cup the blond’s face. Unwillingly, Tommy leans into the touch, as if he wanted some positive human touch for the first time in a while- Phil made a mental note to talk to his son about it. “I’m so sorry- I thought I had-” He chokes slightly, on his words, as if he was about to cry.    
  
Techno can already feel a few emotions churning in his chest-- Regret for yelling, empathy towards the boy, and a hint of fear towards the voices murmurs, although he tries to block them out for the sake of comforting his youngest brother. 

“I thought I...I really did. I’m sorry, Tommy.” He forces out, trying to keep his voice as steady. 

“It’s--It’s okay.” Tommy chokes out, deciding he is definitely still mad at Technoblade, but he feels like he understands that it wasn’t entirely his fault. “Can we-- Can we just..Talk about this later? Please.” Tommy mumbles, and Techno nods. Philza, keeping a slightly neutral face, holds both of his alive boys to his chest, using his wings to hold them both as he tries to comfort them the best he can. He promises to himself, and to them, he’ll do better. He swears.

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> go check out the co writer!! we did this together on a google doc so the formatting isnt the best but its OKAY!!!
> 
> *screams* this was so so so fun to write!!! clover's such a cool person to work with!!! - Winter


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